“He may find me sexier than a 30-year-old, but I worry that he might no longer want me”
“We often tease each other about our age difference. He calls me “Mrs. Cougar” and threatens to hide my walker, I call him “Mr. Toy boy” and promises to deprive him of going to the park if he doesn’t keep quiet. Nevertheless: I am not as serene as it seems. In vain Damien repeats to me that he has loved me for eight years, that he will always love me and that he does not suffer from not having children, since he loves mine as his own, I worry the idea that he might one day leave me. He swears to me that our fourteen-year difference cannot be seen – he is bald and “born old” (it is he who says so!), whereas I have, it seems, always looked younger than my age-, and that I’m sexier in his eyes than any 30-something, but I know my body isn’t that of the women you see in magazines. After two pregnancies, my breasts and thighs are mottled with stretch marks. Every time we meet a pretty girl, it’s stronger than me, I can’t help watching her out of the corner of my eye.
Vanessa, 53, nutritionist, in a relationship with Damien, 39 (14 years apart)
“I didn’t dare tell him that my biological clock tickled me, I was afraid that he would feel trapped”
“I met Arthur in my gym, in 2017 I had seen his age, without seeing him. I found him sexy as hell. When he made me feel that he liked me, I hesitated for a split second – he was just out of college! – and then I said to myself: why not? I was just beginning to climb the slope after a painful separation and I had already noticed that free men of my age did not run the streets. I was determined to take what there was to take. With Arthur, I felt like I was 20 again. The first two years of our relationship, we rode scooters in Paris, we went to rock concerts and we drank beers with his group of friends on the terrace of cafes until no time. He was never tired. Under the duvet either, for that matter. I had returned to sport, so as not to be the first to say stop. I guided him to my erogenous zones, showed him how to caress them and multiplied the orgasms. It drove him crazy to see a woman who took on herself so much in bed. At 38, my biological clock started tickling me, but I didn’t dare talk to him about it. I was afraid he would feel trapped. He was the first to address the issue. That day, I knew that I had found the man of my life. Despite my “canonical age”, we decided to let nature take its course. I got pregnant a year later”
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Camille, 41, screenwriter, in a relationship with Arthur, 30 (eleven years apart)
“In the eyes of others, I have the impression of being a predator”
“I’ve always been attracted to younger men. Bertrand and I are in love and our age gap is not an issue between us. We never talk about it. Everything could therefore go for the best in the best of worlds, if it were not for the eyes of others. I often feel like a predator. When I am asked for a photo of my lover, I systematically kick in touch. He too resents the fact of “sometimes being taken for a gigolo”. One day, I wanted to kiss him in front of his colleague, but he sketched my kiss. He apologized, but it hurt me terribly. »
Anne-Laure, 59, in a relationship with Bertrand, 42 (seventeen years apart)
“I spent my time putting away his things, as if I were his mother”
“Thomas is my best friend’s brother. The first time we saw each other, we hit it off. We met again for a drink, then a second… and a third. A week later, we were together. I didn’t even have time to realize that it was falling on me. At the beginning of our relationship, he made me laugh a lot. We brushed our teeth together in front of the mirror, making funny faces. It was also funny to see that he didn’t have the same credentials as me. He barely knew Amy Winehouse. When she died, he was still watching cartoons, while I was already clubbing. Doubt set in after three months. He was a student and didn’t have a penny. I paid for the cinema, the restaurant and even the Uber that took him home. When he spent the weekend at my house, I spent my time putting away the things he left lying around, as if I were his mother. The discrepancy was glaring. I broke up last month, but have remained the best of friends”.
Delphine, 31, in a relationship with Thomas, 23 (eight years apart)
*some identities have been changed